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Asking for a Friend: How Do I (Temporarily) Quit Dating?

Relationship coach and boundary expert Silvy Khoucasian helps one single Brooklynite adjust to the idea of not dating again until COVID-19 cases drop (or a vaccine becomes available)….

In these uncertain times, it’s hard to know how to navigate even the things that once felt simplest. With this new advice column, we’ll be soliciting the help of qualified experts as we explore the deeply personal, only occasionally ridiculous issues that are flummoxing us during the COVID-19 pandemic.

I’m a (relatively) young, single Brooklynite who went through what one might call a second adolescence after coming out as queer at age 24. While my early 20s were defined primarily by avoiding dating at all costs, the last three years have been a flurry of Tinder, Hinge, and Lex encounters—until March, that is, when the COVID-19 pandemic forced me to hit pause on my search for romance.

After a slow return to precaution-laden dating during the relatively safe summer months, I realized when cases skyrocketed in early November that I would need to close my circle yet again. The question remains, though: After going on literally hundreds of dates in the past few years, how am I supposed to adjust to not going indoors with anyone new—or, in other words, zero non-platonic dating whatsoever—until cases drop and/or a vaccine achieves meaningful saturation?

For help with this quandary, I turned to relationship coach Silvy Khoucasian, who specializes in helping people set healthy boundaries. Sure, those boundaries are normally set within existing romantic relationships, but could Khoucasian’s advice help me redefine my relationship with dating as a single person? Read on to find out.

Okay, stupidest question first…Is it possible to be addicted to dating?

Well, at one point I might have said I was addicted to dating! I don’t like to use the word “addicted,” though, because it can be very pathologizing. I think we have certain needs we might want to fill through dating, and we can absolutely recognize when those needs start coming from a place of anxiety. Exploring that anxiety, and taking breaks from dating, can actually be really helpful.

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Do you think it’s possible that knowing I can’t really date during the COVID-19 pandemic is actually making me want to date more?

Well, it’s all about naming the existential challenges—the loneliness, right? And the feeling of desperation, of clinging to something that doesn’t necessarily feel nourishing. Part of it is about acknowledging and normalizing those things. For example, skin hunger is very real right now, for people in relationships and especially for people who are single and don’t have people touching them as regularly. People are also dealing with existential crises as they’re faced with illness and potential death, so they might feel an extra pull to grasp for relationships.

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Artist Spotlight

Rare Nike Air Foamposite One Yankees Sample Hits the Market

HonkMagazine

Sneaker culture is all about exclusivity, and sometimes, a truly special pair comes along that gets everyone excited. One such sneaker is the Nike Air Foamposite One Yankees Sample, a unique blend of basketball history and baseball style. With its striking look and connections to two famous sports worlds, this rare sneaker has just hit the resale market, and collectors are eager to get their hands on it. Originally created for basketball star Penny Hardaway, the Foamposite One became a staple of ’90s sneaker fashion. Its innovative design was groundbreaking at the time.

However, this special Yankees-themed version takes it a step further. It features a deep navy blue and bright white color scheme, resembling the classic pinstripes of the New York Yankees, one of the most celebrated teams in baseball. The unique wave design that runs across the upper part makes this sneaker stand out, giving it a dynamic look and feel. Unlike the regular versions sold in stores, this sample was never mass-produced, which adds to its appeal among collectors and passionate Yankees fans. Currently listed on Index PDX in size 9 for an impressive $3,500, the price reflects how rare it is.

However, what really matters is the story behind it. From basketball courts to everyday life, the Foamposite One has always been a symbol of performance and fashion. This Yankees edition connects two sports that have captured the hearts of fans for generations. For those lucky enough to own this sneaker, it’s a statement piece. It showcases Nike’s dedication to exploring and celebrating sports culture. Whether proudly displayed or worn to show off hometown pride, the Yankees Foamposite One serves as a reminder of the unforgettable moments shared between basketball and baseball.

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Artist Spotlight

Kim Kardashian’s Tesla Robot Photoshoot Sparks Social Media Firestorm

HonkMagazine

Kim Kardashian is no stranger to stirring up controversy, but her latest photoshoot has generated quite a surprising backlash. Recently, she shared a striking set of images for Perfect Magazine, where she posed alongside a humanoid robot from Tesla and sat on top of a shiny Cybertruck. The shoot was intended to playfully highlight her reputation as being “robotic,” something she feels has been used to describe her in the media. “I think the big joke about doing the shoot with the robot is that I feel like I’m so robotic,” she explained. However, not everyone found it amusing.

Many people online expressed their disapproval, and it wasn’t just about the futuristic look of the photos. Critics viewed the shoot as a nod of support for Tesla’s CEO, Elon Musk, who is currently a controversial figure facing boycotts. One commenter remarked, “She definitely picked a side,” while another harshly suggested that the Cybertruck could be iconic only if it were on fire! The discussion quickly expanded beyond fashion, with some linking the imagery to international conflicts. “Well, that’s a very clear side just picked, the same one that sides with Russia. Not great,” one user stated.

This incident highlights how public figures like Kardashian are closely watched for their choices and associations. Even what might seem like a fun photoshoot can carry significant meaning. While she intended the shoot to be lighthearted, the timing raised concerns for many fans, especially with Musk’s political connections currently under scrutiny and Tesla facing criticism. Despite the backlash, Kardashian has chosen to stay quiet and let the photos speak for themselves. As always, she is navigating between bold fashion choices and cultural debates, showing that whatever she does, people will have something to say about it. It remains to be seen if she will respond to the controversy or move on to her next big moment.

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