James Chelliah and Cam May are excited to release “I cannot tell, I do not know” on the 2nd of January 2022. “I cannot tell, I do not know” – a follow up to “Hold On, Pt. 2”, James’s highly-acclaimed collaboration with Moses Boyd and DARGZ – is an existential indie rap project accompanied by a graphic diary created by textile designer and illustrator Grace Joyram, which aims to present a detailed composite representing the range of emotions experienced and explored throughout the pandemic and subsequent lockdowns.

The project is a clarion call for those blindly walking through a life lived within the preordained boundaries set by others, and a sonic jolt to those whose bodies and minds are tired of the endless fight against the accepted norm. It explores the odd simultaneous contentment and frustration felt by many over the past two years, juxtaposing the tranquillity of monotony against discomfiting feelings of stagnation and aimlessness brought about by pandemic life.

Cam artfully plays with contrasts of light instrumentation and minor melodies to emphasize James’ scathing lyrics, ensuring that frankness is breathed into each piece. ‘Yaldabaoth’ layers mellow guitars with probing lyrics that question the obsession with social media, the transience of young-adult friendships, and living life through a lens, before slamming the listener into ‘Slurp’, a hypnotic and provoking ode to social proof and the desire to belong. As James notes “I looked at the life I was living and decided that I’d had enough. I reassessed friendship expectations, ambitions, communication norms, wants, needs. I started to make changes to reflect what I wanted: less of everything the world told me was important.”

This theme of contrasts continues with the ripe melancholy of ‘Fullish’ and its considered contemplation of the always-online world, and the mocking sonics and lambasting lyrics of ‘Couch’. The use of interludes and instrumental tracks ‘Alone’ and ‘Emptyish’ serve to tease kernels of the potential for us to live alternate lives, and create a space to digest what has been heard prior. The project concludes with ‘Something, at least drawing the listener to relief in recognizing that there can be a route to peace in the gradual acceptance of the different reality thrust upon us. Of the graphic diary, Grace says, “Initially the imagery is complex, jumbled, and caliginous. However, as the pages turn, the visuals get clearer and more comprehensible, representing the gradual acceptance of a different reality as time passed. The outcome represents a new perspective that we were able to gain from each passing day; a slower world allowing extra contemplation.”

The message of “I cannot tell, I do not know” shines a light on a risk we all face – becoming victims of the machinations of capitalist culture which keep us falsely satiated and unquestioning. James says: “We started writing this project when we realized that we weren’t looking forward to returning to a pre-covid life. Every day feels like a fight against conditioning, a fight against the self. The weight of the old world is heavy, what we’ve learned is light. The usual is returning and I cannot stop it. But I won’t participate. I cannot tell, I do not know.”

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